Daily Variety

My Friday- St. Patrick's Day
Wake up at 6:20am. Hmmmmm . . I really could get some more shut-eye, but little boy is sick, and thus wakes up earlier than usual. So, to get some precious time to myself to think about the day and maybe accomplish a thing or two, I get up.

I make some tea, check my email, read a few Bible verses. I get about 20 minutes, and then little boy is up. His first words of the day are ususally "good morning", or something like that, but today I hear "My ear hurts!" and his lower lip is protruding in a very sad way. Ok, maybe a call to the pediatrician is in order - he has been sick for 7 days now - so an ear infection wouldn't be out of the question. It's almost 7am, so I have two hours before the Dr.'s office takes calls.

The next two hours are a mixed bag of household chores: emptying the dishwasher ( I'm thrilled that I remembered to run in the night before!!) - making beds, putting away shoes, running a load of laundry, blah, blah, blah. Along with the chores I read a few blogs, look at my daily 'to-do' list from yesterday and transfer what didn't happen yesterday to today's list, get a call from our handyman/fix-it guy that he'll be by at 10-ish to finish a few small jobs and make a grocery list since I am in charge of a few food items for my sister's bridal shower on Saturday. (which is actually today)

I must add here that for whatever reason, this week I have now been to the grocery store 3 times, and the trip I'll have to make today will make it 4. Four grocery trips in the span of 6 days?!! I think I should be planning a little better. And the main food item I'm in charge of for the shower is Sangria. You see, it's a "Girl's Night Out" bridal shower, so the 'signature drink' for the evening is the Sangria - that I am in charge of making. (I should add here, I really don't drink at all, but this is the job I have, and Sangria involves chopping alot of fruit, so it's more like a food recipe.) I decide to use a Martha Stewart Recipe from the Aug. 03 issue. Yes, I have that issue, because I keep all of my MSLiving magazines since I started recieving the subsricption, oh like, 10 years ago. I'm not a collector of anything really at all - but for some reason I have saved every single one of these magazines. And I use them like little encyclopedia's for home-making, recipies, ideas, etc. Another one of my favorite issues is the May '98 which has a great article on organizing a garage. I used it to help with the garage organization of our previous house.

Another thing - our house is now on the market. So, along with the everyday tasks, I am now trying to keep the house as clean as possible in case it needs to be 'shown' to anyone.

Ok, back to my day: 9am rolls around and I call for the Dr.'s appt. All she has left is 3:30pm - I'll take it! However, the rest of the day, I question whether or not I should take him in. Is he really that sick? Will he catch something else from the waiting room? I often feel foolish for taking him in and then she says, "it's a virus/cold" and we just need to wait it out.

So the remainder of the morning/early afternoon is spent having the handyman fix the stuff, going to the grocery store with sick little boy (who actually does quite weil - so well that I consider cancelling his Dr.'s appointment), exchanging phone calls with the relator, prepping lunch for little boy and myself (he hardly eats anything - maybe the Dr's visit is a good idea after all??) and chopping all the fruit for the Sangria and letting it marinate in some liquors. I put little boy down for a 'rest' also, but he just plays the whole time.

We leave for the Dr'.s office and on the way there (a 15 min. car trip) little boy falls asleep! Once we're inside the office he's awake again and watching the fish in the fish tank. The diagnosis?? Ear infection. Pink medicine prescription is issued, he picks out a toy and we're on our way to the pharmacy. I get to the counter and the gal informs me that it will be over 1 hour before the prescription is ready. So, we trek back home and I try to get some dinner into the little guy since he'll be going to bed in a matter of a few hours since he had no nap.

The rest is boring details (like this wasn't boring so far!!), but I did remember to wear some green for St. Patrick's day, and ate a Shamrock -shaped cookie after dinner.

I had a point to sharing all this, but I completely forgot what it is.

Repentance, Humility & Lent

Yesterday was the beginning of the Lenten season. Because I have been attending a Presbyterian church the past year-and-a-half, I've been more aware of the liturgical calendar, and specifically the season of Lent. My first exposure to it was actually a few years ago when the pastor at the EV Free church I was attending fasted & prayed for the 40 days of Lent. The year after that I read the 40 days of Purpose in Rick Warren's "Purpose Driven Life" and I think I gave up chocolate as well. I don't remember specifically what I did last year (being the mother of a small child tends to deplete brain cells), and that brings me to today.

Last night the Presbyterian church had a Lent service and I was (amazingly) able to attend. (Again, having a small child can make going out in the evenings a bit challenging). It was a beautiful service - very quite, the lights dimmed and candles lit. We sang praise and worship songs along with "When I Survey the Wondrous Cross", and it was a wonderful time of just focusing on Christ. Just having a time to quiet my spirit, sing out words of praise and receive communion helped me to find His peace. Of course right before going to the service I was a frenzied mess of trying to get dinner prepped, answering the phone, cleaning up a glass broken by little boy and getting myself ready to go out the door. Nothing like showing up to a reflective Lent service completely stressed-out. But, that's kind of what it needed to be, so I could get myself calmed down, to "stop striving" and just 'be' with God. I was looking forward to communion, and I enjoyed the flow of the service and the songs especially, but I was just a tad freaked-out by what they called "the imposition of ashes". I know not only Catholics observe Lent, but that specific practice seems especially Catholic to me. (Maybe because most of the people I used to see with something on their forheads during this time were Catholic folks). At this particular service they focused on the phrase "ashes to ashes, from dust to dust" - from dust we came, to dust we shall return. (?) I kept thinking about the whole resurrection body thing, but now I'm wandering a bit. But the thing that I really took away from the service and specifically the receiving of ashes on my forhead was a sense of humility. To humble myself before the God who gave his only Son, the Son who agonzied in the garden over what he was called by the Father to do and to realize the cost and sacrifice so that I may live forever with Him. It really is beyond what I can comprehend or even express here. Not only do I get to live and serve forever with God, but I also get to live for and serve Him for as long as I'm here. And when the days are tough, long and frustrating, I'm promised the help of the Holy Spririt, and can call on him day and night. In fact, I'm told I need to cling to Jesus, run to him, call on him and constantly depend on him, rather than depend on myself.

And as I sat in the pew and called out to God, and clung to Him, I was reminded of some events of the past few days with my son. He's been a little clingy lately. He has a tough time with transitions as it is (known as a "Spirited Child", but that's for another post), and he's been practically begging me to play with him everyday. I'd rather not admit it, but his behavior has really been annoying to me lately. I had to peel him off of me on Wednesday when I left him in the kids-time so I could go to a bible study, and had to walk away watching him cry, and instead of feeling compassion for him I was so glad I was having some "me" time. (He was fine just a few minutes after I left, and I spent a good part of the bible study praying for him) I was struck by the images of the past few days, and more specifically my attitude. Is God EVER annoyed with me when I call on Him? Even if I call on him repeatedly - upwards of 100 times a day - "God HELP me!!". When my son is in need, whether it's for comfort, for companionship, for discipline (teaching & boudaries), or for help, I can do it with a gracious attitude and a loving heart. I was reminded of the image of myself talking to little-boy through clenched teeth, with a harsh tone of voice, as I was trying to get him to be quite while I breifly talked on the phone, and thought, "there's a better way". It only takes me about 30 seconds longer to stop, look to the Lord/call on him/ask him for help, and then THINK about what I want to say and how I could say it, and then proceed with the action. So I repented of my attitude, and my goal is to contine to repent, in the sense that I turn from the way I would naturally handle a stiuation, and go a new direction - His direction for my interactions with others

I haven't realy given up anything for Lent this year, like food or tv shows (I don't even get to watch the ones I TiVo!). But maybe what I need to give up are my selfish and unloving reactions, and instead embrace the humility of Jesus, and choose the better way.